Life. Life as been really getting to me lately.
I feel like such a louse. I'm 18, I should be at college or have my own place.
My family is slowly draining all my native trustfund money. Everyone needs money and I just can't say no to them. I can't. I just can't.
I don't have a job, having a hard time finding one. Been so depressed lately.


I haven't talked to any of my irl friends for a while. I have been really closed off. I don't want to be near anyone. Just held up in my room. Also been going on about 4 hours of sleep a night. I want to sleep, but I just end up lying awake for hours.

Confusing emotions are depressing me. Feels like I can't trust anybody. I was so proud of my dad when he stopped drinking. Around that same time, my mom's husband stopped drinking too. But now they're both at it again. They are both so terrible when they're drunk.

My brother is going through some bad shit. And last night my dad only made it worse. I told him not to talk to John when he's drunk. He would only make it worse.

My dog Eddie is sick again.

I want to be happy. Not just content. I want to be honestly happy about my life. I want my family to be happy. I don't want to hear my brother cry anymore. But until I can actually change the way things are going in my life, I gotta cope.

tl;dr learn to deal wit it

I've been feeling depressed lately. I haven't really done anything due to feeling tired and deeply sad. FUCK. I think it has something to do with me being back in Michigan. All my friends are at college and i'm being a bum. aaa.

when my friends do visit, all they want to do is go out drinking. I don't like alcohol, the only times I do drink are when I'm with my friends on very rare occassions. But goddamn, that's all they want to do. They don't want to go to the movies or anything. aaa. But i guess college is very stressful, and that's the only way they know how to unwind. :I


Here's a bit of art.

( poop )

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This wallpaper is so friggin glorious...that I-I...I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ENEL, YOU GODLY, MAGNIFICENT BASTARD.

     Today I went and invested my money in a bank C.D. It feels so good to know my money is being used for something remotely responsible. I put in 8,000 into a 6 month C.D. AAAH~

     Also, Jordan is coming to visit today! It's been so boring since she went to college. (SIGH) Makes me feel like a bum that all my friends are at college and...i'm not. I would have gone this year if it wasn't for my dad botching up the filing.
     Its hard trying not to become complacent. I've been working out a lot, and taking two language classes. I'm learning Ojibwe down at the tribal center, and continuing my Spanish. YAY.

   Yesterday I found an old art cd with drawings I scanned when I was still in high school. SWEET YEAH BABY.

( Fart )

    

     Finally got to chat with Zero again! Oh god, i've forgotten how awesome it is chatting with him. D:

     He also convinced me to start my own webcomic. It's going to be pretty simple, mostly random stuff and some strips written by Zero. I'll start working on the comic once I find a good webcomic site or figure out html.


Sorry if this doesn't look like you, Zero. I'm still practicing.

( Two comics for Zero )

      Life has been extremely good recently. Everything seems to be going my way, and I couldn't be any happier. I sorted stuff out with my mom, so we've been getting along surprisingly well. Now it seems that my money issues are no longer top priority, which means I can now focus on more important things.
      I have been working out a lot and trying to get my weight down. At the moment I've been jogging two miles in the morning and two miles in the late afternoon. I feel great! Also been trying to cut out the junk food, which is hard because I love mexican food. : (
     Since I switched to a different A.D.H.D medication, my attention span and focus has become phenomenal. Finally, the waves of creativity have returned! I have so much stuff I want to draw and write that its just pouring out. About five pages of my sketchbook contain thumbnails for drawings I want to make. It feels so good.
     Sadly, uploading images will be a problem for now. The scanner I have is pretty lame and I still can't get Photoshop to work. Anyone have any suggestions for a decent, reliable scanner? Oh, and a good printer.

( Drawings from here and there )

Also bought One Piece Season Two: First Voyage. OH LAWDY. The voice acting is so wonderful, which everyone already knows. My only complaint was Ms. Valentine's Day didn't have her unique laugh "Kyahahahaha".

Before I ever heard Mr. 5 speak, he was cool as hell in the manga. But after hearing his english voice.....MR. 5 IS NOW THE SUAVEST MOTHERFUCKER IN ONE PIECE.

Now I can do all the stuff that adults do!








Like buy some porn hehehehe

Me in a nutshell.

Viz will release 5 volumes of One Piece per month for 6 months, starting in Jan 2010. And jump to Impel Down in SJ at that time.

Copypasted from here http://community.livejournal.com/one_piece/967968.html


OMG YOU GUYS THIS IS WAY TOO FUCKING AMAZING. FINALLY WE WILL BE CAUGHT UP IN THE MANGA YEEESSSSSSSSS!!!

I only hope Viz will do their best with the jump in the magazine. I mean, how are they going to explain it to the casual readers? 

BUT STILL THIS IS AWESOME

Hopefully I will have money for when all these volumes come out!

I'm only up to chapter 112 of Fairy Tail and I know I got a bit to go until I am caught up, but..

I HATE YOU LUXUS, I HATE YOU EVERGREEN, I HATE YOU BIXLOW, I HATE YOU FRIED
THE RAIJINSHUU SUCK
MY ANGER IS BUILDING OVER THE PAST COUPLE CHAPTERS


Edit:
Okay okay. Luxus, its good to see that you still have your humanity.
Gosh, the part with Gramps during the parade choked me up. ;^;

R.I.P. Billy Mays  ;_;

Please 2009, stop taking all these people away.

OH FUCK. I'm trying to install Adobe Photoshop Elements 6.0 onto my computer and it won't work! Okay, so I install it then restart it, and then nothing happens! After waiting for like an hour a box pops up saying I don't have the right registry code at this time. WHAT. I've uninstalled and re-installed the damn thing at least four times and I can't figure out what's wrong. Stupid adobe.com isn't much help. I followed all of their steps and Photoshop still doesn't work. If I don't have this problem solved by Tuesday I'm going to call them up myself. I am so angry right now.

I haven't updated in FOREVER.

I graduated from High School, omg no more work until college ;___;

I ALSO GOT MYSELF A BRAND SPANKIN NEW COMPUTER HOLY SHIT. I love this thing so much it hurts. I know I always bitch about windows vista, BUT IF YOU HAVE A GOOD AMOUNT OF MEMORY ITS COOL BRO. I'm still putting stuff on it, like transferring my files from my shit laptop. So much stuff its crazy.

No art this time. I don't know what's wrong with me, but when I'm not on my meds I lose all aspiration to draw. So sad.
Uh, I moved in with my crazy mom in Wisconsin. WHY DID I DO THIS. I still have to go back to Michigan to pack up my stuff. :(


All in all, I've been feeling pretty damn good.




ONE MORE THING.
Oh my god Kia, how on earth did you get my account password for photobucket?! I only gave you the guest password!

Just dumping a whole lot of sketches. One day I shall create a finished piece. Maybe

( OH BOB SAGET )

Damn, this weekend was pretty bad. I had another fight with my mom over my graduation pictures. Once I got a good look at them I simply said, "They look a little blurry", then the shit storm came rumbling in. Boy did she flip out. She yelled at me the entire car ride back from Woodruff. When we got home she started crying, yeeeesh.

We always seem to argue whenever I go to visit her. She just loves to bring me down and make me feel bad. Ah well, only two more months of dealing with her, then I get to move in with my aunt. My aunt is fixing me up with a job, and I'll be taking courses at the Nicolet campus in Rhinelander. I honestly can't wait for graduation!

All right bro dawgs. Finally got wireless internet hooked up in dis piece, so nows I can hang on da computer without my old man bugging me and whatever youknowhowwedo.

Art. My poor neglected lover. Oh how I long for the aches of your love.
Posting some simple photoshop junk and photos. Particulary my dog Eddie!

( Photos )
( Art )

My bro said he will be getting this game soon. I'm pretty late to the game but AW YEAH BROTHER

Spring Break was pretty okay. I spent the whole vacation with my mom 9_9 So meh.

I am pretty happy that the weather is getting warmer but...FUCKING ASSASSIN'S CREED 2 AND BIOSHOCK 2 ARE COMING OUT IN FALL AND DECEMBER. OH MY GOSH I CAN'T WAIT

Oh man. AC2 is going to take place around Venice and involve Leonardo De Vinci. wat.
And Bioshock 2 is going to be so badass. Playing a legitimate Big Daddy is going to be boss. AND WIELDING BOTH WEAPONS AND PLASMIDS AT THE SAME TIME? :D
Gorillaz are also coming out with a new album in the next year or two, and a movie is in the works. :>

 

;__; Omg I love Funimation!

 

I'm not sure if everyone already knows this, but One Piece Uncut is going to be released in 2 month intervals. FINALLY. Just think about it, we OP fans will be caught up in the anime in just a few years! Now if only Viz would stop being a bitch and release the manga quicker. I mean honestly!

Art will be put here once I burn them off my laptop.